Memento Mori/Memento Vita

Went for a wake yesterday, my uncle recently passed away from complications from his surgery. Life is short, and death is the only certain thing in it. Thankfully he passed on when my cousins were more or less capable of supporting my auntie and themselves.

It is said that life is a game. And in more than a few ways it is. Death is the one great foe in the game of life. It makes us lose. Death is the inevitable loss that everyone will face sooner or later. Hopefully later for most people. In life we always try to win, always trying to get what we want, in dreams, career, ambition, love and etc. Yet death comes and shatters everything, making grand fools of us all. A sickening thought. It need not even reach us, but just touch someone close, and our lives can be in turmoil.

In other words, life is a game where you cannot win.

Where is the point in playing a game you cannot win? Is it not often said that only fools play a game where there is no clear chance of winning? It is in fact not rational to play a game expecting to win when evidence shows that you will most surely lose. Life is like that. We are alive, and we live like we are going to win, or have already won, but we will lose, it is inevitable. Why not just give up from the start if we have no chance of winning?

It seems wrong to do so. There is a saying, that it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. Perhaps. Perhaps we need not win in order for something to be of value.

In the unknown time between us and unknown death, we live. And perhaps we live not because we exist, but because we will die. We live like we will die, and that is what makes us alive. To exist with an end in mind. Perhaps sometimes that is all that is needed to feel alive. To know death is one, to experience death is another, but to live we must understand that death will come, and so we do everything we can to live, to defy it, to render it's victory meaningless, to make our loss irrelevant.

Remember that you will die, but also remember that you are alive. Live your life so well that even death itself will tremble to take you.

Lingua Latina

Yay I finally got promoted. Now I'm a Lance Corporal. With the extra $20 comes more responsibilities and more shit work. Damn. But I'll take the $20 anyway. Beggars can't be choosers. Passed my shooting. Wasn't really that bad, but still one day is lost to the lousy ARMY.

And guess what I'm going to be taking Latin Language classes come January. Brenda contacted me today about some guy teaching Latin at Tanglin CC for 10 lessons at $110. Quite a steal really. So we've both signed but for it and classes start on the 4th. Quite surprising that Brenda wants to learn Latin, haha I sure didn't expect her to come forward with the suggestion. I was looking and scouring through Classifieds for a semblance of Latin language schools, but haven't been able to find any. What a breakthrough. Can't wait to get started.

Actually Latin is really a dead language, but I still think that it's cool how Latin was the root to German, French, Italian, English and Spanish languages. I tried to study Latin on my own once, reading the Idiot's guide to Latin. But apparently I was more idiotic than an idiot and couldn't understand shit. SO. I guess I will be needing help. It's great that I'm going to be studying with someone familiar tho, makes it less boring.

No Memory

Wow I forgot my password the last few months. And by some random stroke of chance/genius, I managed to get it right. What a long time it has been. You know there's this saying that having lousy memories is as good as having none at all? Well, it seems that the person who said that may have hit the mark. (Ok there isn't such a saying, I made it up.) BUT. The point isn't who said it, but that it is actually quite true. (Or not.) NEVERTHELESS. (I like using conjunctions. ALTHOUGH I have no idea why.) I am becoming increasingly random, pointless, senseless, disorderly and sinking into madness and the pure extreme carnage of using too many adjectives and adverbs in increasingly chaotic and completely absurd syntaxes without the proper and accurate use of punctuation and the observance of phonetical and respiratory regulations.



It seems Army has taken a toll on my sanity. Or rather it seems Army has taken too much sanity out of me that only insanity is left. But anyway, after that horrendously long paragraph, today I wish to talk about a part of my life, money.

I AM VERY POOR ALL OF A SUDDEN. They say I'm going to be promoted soon, which means a measly $20 increase in pay. But that's not enough. I find their lack of monetary incentives disturbing.

This weekend...there's shooting. I don't get it. Why does my luck suck so much. They told me on last Wed that the 3 days I had to shoot. I found it ridiculous, so I went to take ATT B, which is an excuse from strenuous activities so I won't have to go. So they scheduled it this Sunday...just...my...luck.

What password?

So uh I forgot my password, which was why I have not blogged in such a long time. I'm kind of tired after repeatedly trying out different combinations of letter and numbers so I'll post something some other time..zzz